Granna Bytes: Counsel from Forrest Gump

By Anna Von Reitz

If you have been following along, you know that Granna has served as Maid of Honor or later, Matron of Honor, sixteen times.  Later this year, I have the tongue-in-cheek honor of serving once as "Best Man", too. 

You would think that by now, I would know a great deal about love, having mid-wifed (all but two) so many successful marriages, and having had my own 32-year marriage last "until death do us part".  

Certainly, I have had all the heartaches, all the triumphs, all the panoply of love in all its seasons and variations, the love of friends, the love of lovers, the love of desperate causes, the love that has no conditions, the love that demands ultimate vulnerability --- yes.  

No doubt, this is why people take me for an expert and are disappointed when they ask my advice and I point at the reflections of St. Paul, faithfully recorded as First Corinthians 13: 4-8.  In this brief, immortal passage, Paul outlines how love expresses itself, what it embraces, what it endures, and what it refuses to do.  

It's my all-time guidepost and was my saving grace as a young person levelling up my own understanding of what love is -- and this is an important understanding for everyone to have, but increasingly I get pleas from those who read this passage and still need support on the fundamentals.  

How about the advice of Forrest Gump?  A man who definitely knew "what love is" ?

What I Have Learned from Forrest Gump

 

Love doesn't hurt.  It heals.  Healing begins with recognition.

Love honors your Soul.

Love knows no fear of vulnerability.

Love walks quietly beside you.

Love is consistent and enduring.

Love keeps faith with you.

Love doesn't question its truth.

Love never gives you bad advice.

Love feels your pain.

Love respects your fears.

Love meets your needs.

Love accepts your limitations.

Love nurtures and defends.

Love doesn't ask you to abandon your truth.

Love notices when you are weary, anxious or sad.

Love is often silent and simply present.

Love is reliable, steady, and gentle.

Love smiles when you walk through the door.

Love doesn't hide or disguise.

Love is always innocent.

Love is loyal.

Love shares its good fortune.

Love accepts loneliness and suffering.

Love doesn't forget.

What Forrest Gump Teaches Us

Speak kindly to yourself, always.

Speak to yourself kindly, but without pride.

Accept your imperfections.

Accept your limitations.

Know that you are loved anyway.

Know that you have special gifts.

Be fair to you.

Notice the treasures of your soul.

Be patient with yourself.

Protect your heart.

It's okay to have boundaries.

Value your own integrity.

Remember the things you've overcome.

Feel things fully, even pain.

Then release the pain.

When you feel unseen, unheard, unloved...

See yourself, hear yourself, love yourself.

Look in the mirror.

See more than the physical image.

See your courage and generosity.

See your willingness to care and to share.

Your true love will mirror you.

Say, "I am ready to live my truth."

Muster your courage, strength and self-respect.

Say, "I'm ready for someone whose love doesn't falter."

Notice how people unconsciously treat you.

Do they light up when they see you?

Are they really listening?

Do they treat your body with reverence?

Do they care about your health?

Do they cherish your soul?

Are you always part of their picture?

Is your loneliness their own?

Release anyone and anything that isn't yours.

Say, "I release what doesn't belong to me."

Say, "My arms are empty to receive what's mine."

Then stand back and know:

You are acting in good faith.

Good faith and peace will come to you. 

Know this: the past doesn't matter.

Past pain doesn't matter.

What matters is this moment called "now".

What matters is you.

The people you love.

And those who love you. 

Granna

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